This is my secret
I learned from a UP friend about this site. No advertisements, nothing pesty and irritating. Just what I needed.
I am someone ofcourse. But I just can’t say my name here. hahaha. This is my secret. My secret blog. Where I can just speak. Because, like this blog right here. I keep many things to myself. And I know that’s not very nice.
Just so I don’t forget myself, I’m a BSBIO student. I’m no comarts student so my blogs don’t have to be Pulitzer type or Palanca awardee type of shit. hahahaha.
Hmmm. What should I start with. I still think about her. And I don’t know why. I’m still in love and together with Jane. But why is she still on my mind. All the fucking time.
Was is it because she it hit my pride more than anyone else? So screwed me up. Big deal. Actually it is, I never got screwed up before, I do all the screwing. But she screwed me up. I got in way over my head with her. I just want her out of my head. How can I do that? I don’t see her anymore. Not even in pictures. I don’t talk to her anymore. Well I did say my sorry. But that wasn’t even a real conversation. I just want her out.
Why?Why do I want her out? Because she fooled me. She made me believe we could’ve been. That she actually loved me. No one can do that better than I can. But she did. She did it better than me this time.
I don’t think I answered my own question. Why do I want her out? Because Jane deserves me, all of me, just me. She doesn’t need me thinking about her. I love her. I love her and I make her fall in love with me everyday.
She breaks up with me almost once a week. Well I did cheat on her, but its been almost 9 months. Ok, let’s say I deserve it.But I just never get used to it. I should be but it just hurts so much. It hurts more and more because I just keep giving my best and she just wants to break up with me. And its her who is sposed to be chasing me, but I end up chasing her. Because I want her back. Because Im not yet done showing her how sorry I am. And how much I love her.
And still at the end of this blog I still think about her. Someone tell me why.
